"Quieting troubled waters is not the same as rescuing drowning people, and smothering conflict is not the same as helping people to forgive each other."
--Lewis B. Smedes
REDROAD OUTREACH: Validate. Comfort. Empower. Restore.
Introduce an innovative message on forgiveness to organizations with a shared passion to foster the growth necessary for sustainable transformation in the lives of women who've suffered betrayal/abuse.
Jacob to Esau: "My lord knows that the children are weak . . . And if the men should drive them hard one day, all the flock will die . . . I will lead on slowly at a pace which the livestock that go before me, and the children are able to endure" (Genesis 33: 13).
"The Sovereign Lord has given me an instructed tongue to know the words that sustain the weary" (Isaiah 50:4).
"My parents abused me verbally, sexually, and psychologically. The first time I told my Bible study group that I hated my dad they prayed God would help me forgive [him]. What I needed was healing in my heart. I wish they'd prayed for me. Validation and comfort where my greatest needs. A shoulder to cry on from someone who wouldn't criticize me for my inability to forgive. Wendy helped me to understand WHY I struggled to forgive and helped me to move forward."
--Laura [Support Group Attendee]
"To give light to those who sit in darkness and the shadow of death, to guide our feet in the way of peace "(Luke 1: 79).
"I've been a Christian a little over seven years, and I've never experienced any type of healing from the past abuse. I was in a really bad place when I agreed to participate in Wendy's focus group for a study guide she's writing on forgiveness. My heart was broken. I was scared. I didn't know where Jesus would take me, but I knew I'd get to the other side if I would allow myself to feel everything I needed to feel. In church, I always felt like I was doing something wrong for feeling rage.
Wendy freed me to express the pain and anger and hurt that was bottled up in the deepest place of my heart. It was a real turning point. I was finally able to release what had been trapped inside for so long. God gave me my voice back. He gave Wendy a key to open the door for me. And I love her for this." --Ronda
"They have healed the hurt of My people slightly, saying, 'Peace, peace!' when there is no peace" (Jeremiah 6: 14).
"Everyone has need of forgiveness. Previously, I dealt with my wounds by pretending they didn't exist. I heard all the same lessons most people hear in church--how if [you] don't forgive others you will not be forgiven. (And all that it implies.) What I learned from Wendy is how to look beneath my emotional wounds to see the core lies behind them and HOW to give them to Jesus. I recommend this study to all women who've struggled to forgive. It's Bible-based. It's a few months of your life. And it will change you forever." --L [Support Group Attendee]
"He sent His word and healed them, and delivered them from their destruction" (Psalm 107: 20).
Focus-group Attendee: I wouldn't have gone ahead toward healing if it weren't for you. All the times I would start to go ahead and then have a sh*#*% day, I'd quit. I felt like a failure for feeling.
Wendy: Feeling isn't failing. Faking is failing.
"And every one who was in distress, and every one who was in debt, and every one who was discontented, gathered themselves unto him" (1 Samuel 22: 2a).
"God can handle my freak-outs! I can cry, scream, swear, all the while smoking a cigarette, and He won't leave me. He's not angry! He's not disappointed in me! He is grieving with and for me. He is angry about what happened to me, and He will avenge me. We can't always give forgiveness right away. In the beginning it's about constantly yielding our pain up to Him. [It's cyclical.] At some point we are filled enough to give forgiveness away. Wendy reached down into my soul and gave my thoughts and feelings words." --Faith