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The complexities of healing and forgiveness in the emotional aftermath of traumatic events often result in feelings of isolation in one's faith community. Survivor, Wendy Redroad, offers an innovative program where divine purpose is discovered in the passions. Professional recommendations & inspiration.

Mission
E
nlighten faith communities to the unspoken needs of the traumatized.
Defend human dignity.
Initiate an affirming forgiveness program.
Foster sustainable transformation.
Yield to mercy--with justice.
 

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Your gift supports the vision of a Christian culture that utilizes "the passions" to foster intimacy with Christ and unity with his Church.
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Mission EDIFY operates under the fiscal sponsorship of Women's Non-profit Alliance, a 501(c)3 parent organization.

 

What are the passions?

"The passions are the feelings, the emotions or the movement of the sensible appetite--natural components of human psychology--which incline a person to act or not act in view of what is perceived as good or evil. The principle passions are love and hatred, desire and fear, joy, sadness, and anger."

(Compendium CCC, 370. Libreria Editrice Vaticana, 2006) The Compendioum's source on this topic is the teaching of St. Thomas Aquinas.

Thursday, June 7, 2018 7:58 AM

Recognizing the Bonds of Betrayal

Thursday, June 7, 2018 7:58 AM
Thursday, June 7, 2018 7:58 AM

                                                                   He was my mother's new love interest after my parents divorced. I wore a pink dress to their wedding. In pictures, I'm grasping the lightweight chiffon with one tiny clenched fist. What followed in the years to come forged a humiliating template for my adulthood relationships. 

Fast forward: April 2013; my own divorce is pending. 

Me. I've just spent eighteen years in a relationship that shouldn't have lasted eight days. I am not unintelligent. And I'm always in a ten-week Bible study. How did this happen?

My Psychologist. When you were a child, leaving was not an option. You learned to survive. But now the very skill-set that preserved you as a child works against you in your adult relationships. Have you heard of a book called The Betrayal Bond?

What I learned that year:

I absolutely hated how my husband treated me most of the time but not once did I look in a mirror and think I don't deserve this. My brain was as bound to him as it was to the man who sexually abused me when I was a child.

That's how it happened.

The success of #MeToo is not solely contingent on public cries for recognition and demands for social justice. (Though necessary components.) It must include tangible steps to reconciliation and restoration. A re-forging of skewed relationship templates, beginning with how we relate to ourselves, and how we relate to God.

Here's why:

"You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your strength, and with all your mind; and your neighbor as yourself" (NAS).

I had no idea my mind played tricks on me--that "Mr. Right" was all wrong. After all, I'd prayed about our relationship before we married. But truth is, I'd yet to learn to love myself. Love for self came AFTER I conceded that God's thoughts are higher than my own.

There are two words, in my opinion, that every survivor should become well-acquainted with in the care of God:

1) No; and 2) Wait.

If your "love" for a person extends beyond the capacity of your love for God and self, you will lack discernment in your decision making. (Trust me. I learned this the hard way.)

 

We get better together,

Wendy

 

 

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